Archive for August 31, 2012

31 Aug 2012
Autism • humor • Marriage • Moms • Parenting • school-age • Special Needs • Tweens

Pace Yourselves

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Yes, the above picture is my kitchen. Blech!!!

When I see messes like this it’s so easy to condemn myself. “I’m a horrible housekeeper, a failure as a mom, and a slacker wife…”

And I hear so many other women say the same things. Why do we do it to ourselves?

After having a mean talk with myself, I stepped back. Yes, it looks like a group of gremlins invaded the kitchen and brought some trolls along, but I did other things that were more important.

I spent time outside with Rachel, who needed to water plants to decompress from her school day. I spent over an hour in the car picking up kids, and did the host of other mommy things that so many of us can’t name after a long day. I’m sure you’ve been there.

Even though I don’t attain perfection, or even come close to it, is that a reason to condemn myself? Nope! So, instead of freaking out I had a cup if tea.

Take that, guilt! But, seriously, gremlins, you are no longer welcome…

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29 Aug 2012
Autism • humor • Marriage • Moms

Cleaning the home office

By Jennifer Dyer

Step one: Clean off the main desk.

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Step Two: Place all recycling in the basket for Rachel to shred.

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Step Three: Stack all junk on other desk.

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Step Four: Close the door so you can’t see the mess…

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27 Aug 2012
Autism • Moms • real life • school-age • Tweens

School, sniffles and quiet

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That sad face says it all. The house is quiet. Too quiet.

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The beds are empty. The kids are at school. It’s amazing how exhausting mothering can feel, but how empty life can be when school starts up again. I think this “Quiet, too quiet‘” video says it all regarding the quest of a mom wanting quiet. Make sure to watch the ending for the punch line.

Happy “quiet,” moms. For some of you, only some of your kids are away today. For you, you may feel like an emotional Pogo stick: up one moment and down the next. The emotions a mother feels are often like the waves of a tsunami: intense, changing, unexpected, and not to be ignored. :-)

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27 Aug 2012
Marriage • Moms • Parenting • real life • school-age

Funday Monday

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Some days I need a good laugh. Actually most days I do. This week our pastor reminded us of the importance of a good laugh. To paraphrase Proverbs 17:22, “A happy heart is good medicine, but a grumpy attitude shrivels a person like a prune.”

With that in mind, I’m posting this link to Tim Hawkins‘ website and some video clips. Fun stuff! Happy laughing!!!

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27 Aug 2012
humor • Moms • Parenting • school-age • Special Needs • Teens • Travelling • Tweens • Uncategorized

Back-to-school Funday Monday

School starts for us today. For me, it’s going to be rough, full of sniffles and longing. So… I thought I would share this hilarious video. Smiles, all!

Mom My Ride.

Did it make you giggle??? I hope so!

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24 Aug 2012
About me • humor • Moms • Parenting • Uncategorized

Memories

by Jennifer Dyer

School is about to start. I marvel at how quickly time has passed. The days of preschoolers is behind me, but summertime helps me remember some of the exhaustion I felt during those early years of motherhood, although not quite…

I found a few cute pics of those days I thought I would share with you…
Smiles!

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22 Aug 2012
character building/discipline • Marriage • Moms • Parenting • real life • religion • Spiritual Life • Teens • Tweens • Uncategorized

Boys, romance, and dreaming of the future.

by Jennifer Dyer

This morning my daughter mentioned a boy, just in passing. It wasn’t in an I-like-him manner, but it gave me an opening to talk about boys and romance. “Isn’t he that nice boy who used to smile at you when we were at the pool?”

She giggled and ducked behind her chair. At only ten, boys are still strange creatures to her, but the interest is budding among her peers and will be in full swing in the coming years. It’s coming.

I thought about many of our past conversations regarding boys. Most of them included something dogmatic like: “Let’s not think about boys and marriage until you finish your education.”

But in a world where romance is at the forefront of so many minds, is that kind of blanket advice helpful? Does it make her comfortable talking to me? I’m not saying it’s not a good idea to help her set goals, but I also want her to know I understand love and romance are real human needs.

So, I kept up the conversation. “He was a nice boy.”

She shrugged and peeked over the chair back. “I guess, but he’s still wild.”

“Yes, that is true, but … “–my sense of humor took over–”you don’t have to worry about him anyway. I have already arranged for you to marry my friend’s son. He’s a few years older than you so he’ll be finished with college and ready to get married once you’re older. He’s a really great boy. He’s cute too.” I finished the sentence by batting my eyelashes.

She fell off her chair and tried to dive under the couch, but I kept going. “He’s athletic like you, but he also has a sensitive side that you would like. He even plays the violin. He’s very talented. And most important, he really loves Jesus. He is very serious about his faith.”

“MOM!!!!!” came the voice under the couch.

“Just thought you’d want to know. His mom and I have it all planned out. It will be sooooo much fun.”

She peeked over the couch, eyes wide. “Did… did you really?”

I laughed. “No, of course not, well, not seriously. Maybe… Whomever you chose, I hope he’s nice. I know you are going to start liking boys at some point. That’s normal. God created us with those kinds of feelings, but I want you to make a good decision when the time is right.”

She nodded, her white knuckles gripping the cushion.

I still had her attention, so I went on. “Aunt Liz was just saying yesterday that young people desire the things in marriage around age 16, but aren’t ready to get married until later. It takes a lot of wisdom to make it through those times. Daddy and I want to help you get through all that.”

“Uh, okay.”

“And Aunt Liz has a really cute son, too. He would also be a great–”

“Mom!!!” She kicked up dust running away, but I smiled to myself. I had planted some good seeds about how much I care for her future and what kinds of qualities she might like in a person. Plus, it was fun.

On a more serious note, I also just purchased Praying for your Future Husband. Though she is still young, I plan to read it with her in the coming years. I hope help her navigate the muddy waters of romance and the opposite sex, and I want her to know she can depend on us to be there. And, okay, I like to tease her just a bit. She protests, but she loves it. :-)

How about you? What are some ways you were able to bring up the opposite sex in a conversation?

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20 Aug 2012
character building/discipline • Moms • Parenting • school-age • Spiritual Life • Teens • Tweens

Do the right thing … Mom.

by Jennifer Dyer

Today I needed to take eldest to a friend’s house, and we were LATE. We hopped in the car and had gone more than a block when we realized I didn’t have my purse or my driver’s license.

“Mom, you can’t drive without a license. We have to turn around.”

I gripped the steering wheel. I was tired. I’d been scraping wall paper for hours and just wanted to get there. In my mind, I said, “Oh, well. It’s just this one time. It will be fine.”

BUT … she was right.

“Mom, you have to turn around,” said the voice of my daughter-turned-conscious.

It took me another block to make the car turn around. My arms resisted my brain telling them to go home. Another little voice whispered in my mind, “It’s not a big deal. It’s just one teensy little rule. Just get her there. You’re already late.”

Yet, the other voice, the one in the back seat, spoke again. “It’s against the rules to drive without your license. You don’t want to get into trouble, do you? Look, there’s a police car. We’d better get your license or you’ll be in big touble.”

“He’s our neighbor.”

“I know, but you’ll still be in trouble…”

In my defense, I was already on my way home by the time we saw our neighbor’s patrol car, but my mind was on other things. As a mom I work hard to teach my daughter good sense and a desire to follow the rules. Most rules are there for a good reason. Stop signs aren’t there to oppress us, they are in place to keep people from running into each other.

I had a choice to make. I could model the right behavior and put into her mind the picture of a mom who practices what she preaches, who puts doing the right thing ahead of schedules and fatigue, and who obeys God in the little things as well as the big.

OR I could present a picture of a rebellious mom who disregards the rules, sees them as written for those other people, and who doesn’t think doing the right thing is important.

The choice was obvious. I was already headed home, but I thanked her for helping me to do the right thing. Someday, when she is driving, I hope she will remember me making good choices: Driving the speed limit even when we are late. Resisting my phone. Ignoring texts. Driving with my license.

I also hope these moments of my own obedience will help her in making bigger decisions, as well.

What about you? When was the last time you had this choice? What did you do and why?

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17 Aug 2012
Book Reviews • Current events • Moms • Parenting • school-age • Spiritual Life • Teens • Tweens

Meet the BE THE MOM mom, Tracey Eyster

by Jennifer Dyer


I recently interviewed Tracey Eyster, writer and mom, about her latest project, Be the Mom, a book of encouragement for moms of all stages.

Here are some interesting facts about Tracey:

Me: How long have you been a mom?
Tracey: 19+ years.

Me: How long have you been writing for moms?
Tracey: 5 years.

Me: Tell me about your family.

Tracey: I have two wonderful kids – both teens. My beautiful daughter is 19, and my bold and courageous son is 16. I’ve been married to my tall, dark and handsome prince charming Bill for 25 years.

Me: Tell me about your MomLife.

Tracey: Because we have moved four times since having kids, I have had ridiculous messes before and after every move…I finally resolved that messes happen. Oh well! I do like to try and keep order…or at least orderly-ish messes! Do not ever ask to see my bedroom if you come visit my home. And YES I know my bedroom is supposed to be an oasis of love – much of it is…but there’s that area over next to the rocking chair and under the red oak desk where things seem to pile and multiply! And of course my mudroom…is aptly named, though it should probably be the mudroom/there’s no place else to store this room! Relax moms…messes are a reality.

Me: Why did you start this project?

Tracey: I wrote the book for my daughter…several years ago. As I contemplated all that she would someday face as a mom I grew increasingly concerned that she was going to think being a mom was too hard. I wanted her to know that yes, it’s hard…but so worth it. God would mold her children through her and in the process He would mold her through her selfless pouring into them! I basically have a joyful attitude, I choose to most times anyway, so I wanted her to realize she needed to make that same choice regardless of her circumstances. I wanted to pass on the good, the bad and ugly of my own momlife hoping she would find hope and encouragement in my momlife stories and through the lessons God has taught me!

Me: What would you like Be The Mom to bring to others moms?

Tracey: My prayer is that moms would understand motherhood is a gift and that God knows them intimately. He has every plan for the future of their child in His hands, and He has entrusted her with her children. Motherhood is a high calling and extremely important! As she molds her children to be image bearers for God, God is conforming her to His image by her selfless serving. And THAT is great preparation for His future calling on her life!

Me: What is coming up for you?

Tracey: I have been amazingly blessed to be a guest on Focus on the Family, In the Market with Janet Parshall, and on August 23rd and 24th I will be on FamilyLife Today. Currently I have various radio stations from across the country doing radio interviews with me and that is great fun! I am receiving requests to speak at various events and will explore those opportunities, careful to keep my family my continued priority, but basically I am open to whatever God blesses in my desire to speak into the lives of moms. Of course you can always find posts from me and other great moms of every age and stage of momlife at www.momlifetoday.com and you can get straight to me on my personal blog www.bethemom.com – I hope you’ll stop by both and be encouraged in your own momlife!

Tracey Eyster is the Creator and Editor of MomLife Today. Tenacity and a passion for momlife has fueled her relentless pursuit of following God’s call to speak wisdom and truth into the lives of moms through writing and speaking. Tracey is the mom of two teens and her home is regularly full of their friends as she intentionally pours into their lives. She delights in doing video interviews and exploring momlife with all types of moms and even a few “famous” ones. Her first book, Be The Mom is available for preorder. Tracey has been a mom for 18 years and she and Bill have been married for 25 years.

Thanks so much – big hugs from Tracey!!!

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16 Aug 2012
Uncategorized

Questioning the Almighty

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Eldest and I attended her new intermediate school orientation today. Last night I had difficulty sleeping and awoke early this morning with the jitters.

As we walked into school and found out what group she would be with today, we both realized she would not be with anyone she knew. Worse, most of her friends were placed together.

I was transported back to middle school. Awkward emotions, uneasy smiles, new alliances and cliques forming, and all of the pain of adolescence smacked me in the face. I wanted to grab my daughter and run away screaming.

Standing among the group of strange faces, I prayed and whined to the Lord. “Why? This is not fair! How come she is alone again????? We were new here last year and it looks like she is starting over new again!”

She turned to me in that moment and asked the same question. I said, “I don’t know, but I was just praying about it.”

Interestingly, I had just prayed last night God would help me teach her about questions and not understanding His plans. God is big enough for our questions. In fact, asking God questions is a way to deepen faith and make it personal.

So, I put a smile on my face. “Maybe God has people in this group that need a nice friend. I’m sorry. It doesn’t seem fair.”

Then she told me it was time for me to go. Okay, it took me a few moments to severe the umbilical cord, but I did it. She seemed fine when I saw her later in the morning.

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